Stressful summer ahead

It's been since 1st grade that I've been to summer school. I've only had to take summer school after 1st grade because of ESL (English as a Second Language). Other than that, I've spent my summers relaxing and having fun. So this summer, I've decided to take summer classes, only to try to get ahead a little bit. The hardest prerequisites that I have to take is Anatomy and Physiology I and II. So I want to get it out of the way this summer, and take it. One thing that's holding me back is that if I do decide to take it here at ODU, it'll be a rough summer for me, because classes are 3 hours long Monday through Friday. Then the labs are 2 hour long. Also, the cost is very expensive, and Financial Aid doesn't cover summer classes. Social life will be gone for me and I will never have time for anything. That's why I'm thinking about taking the classes at TCC, where it's much more relaxing on the classes, and much cheaper. I'm hoping I can, because it'll help me out much more on top of many things I have to do this summer as well. I'm my sister's wedding planner, so I have many wedding things that I have to do for my sister. So while everyone is relaxing and enjoying their summer, I am going to be very stressed out dealing with a lot of things =/

Family image

I was born into a family that cares deeply of their image. When I say image, I mean from our looks to our reputation, and to the entire family's reputation. It really does suck at some level because my parents doesn't care about our happiness, but rather than their image and what their friends think about our family. For example, if I want to do something, like dye my hair, I'm strictly not allowed to because other people might think that I'm wild and that my parents raised me to be a disappointment. So talking about this subject, my sisters and I, being girls, are extremely pressured to look good, and act good. The fact that we are asians, it leaves us a total disadvantage when it comes to our weight because Asians are typically tiny and petite. So the fact that my older sister and I were basically raised here in America, eating American's food, we are a little bigger than the typical asian size. I don't like it when I'm compared to other asian girls, because I feel like this is who I am, and I shouldn't have to change myself and try to be someone else. Thus, because our weight, my parents are ashamed our my sister and I, and feel embarrassed everytime their friends meet us. It saddens me to the point that I feel like I don't know my parents anymore. Sometimes I think they're so selfish into the "family image" and their pride, that they don't see what and how it's affecting both my sister and I.

Homeless moment

While driving back home to Virginia Beach today, I stopped at a stoplight and waited for the color to turn from red to green on the traffic sign. The light seemed to take forever, so I started to glance around my surroundings and noticed an old homeless man digging in a nearby trashcan for food. I immediately felt an emotion running through, because I've never really realized how many homeless people there were in United States. I've only seen so many back home in Vietnam, and that was typical and obvious, especially from an extreme poor country. But United States is considered the wealthiest country in the world, so how can there be so many homeless? It was heartbreaking to see that old man slowly digging through trash one by one looking for food. An old man who's lived half his life already. I thought to myself, why doesn't he better his life and go out there to find a job? There are so many opportunities out there, so why doesn't he take the time to search for some? It's not like he has anything else to do during the day. Seeing this man made me realize how important life is to anyone.

Monarch mentor

Soon I'll become a Monarch Mentor, and I'm a little excited to be one. We'll be doing a lot of training, group trips, and activities that involves a lot of social benefits. This helps my resume, as well my social endurance. I'm a shy quiet person, and so this will definitely help me break out of my shell. I'll be able to meet many different diversity groups, and learn a lot of from them. It'll allow me to open up more to different cultures, as well as to those of my ethnicity. I've worked as being a mentor before back in high school in the Big Brother Big Sister program, so I know what it takes to be a good mentor and how to connect with those that are in need of help. =)

Issue proposal

For my issue proposal on our final papers, I've decided to write about how universities decide on accepting new students. Whether it's based on the grade point average, extracurricular activities, or SATs/ACTs scores, different universities have different ways on making their decisions. When I applied for college, my first choice was VCU. That was the first school I applied to, and I knew for sure I'd get in. I graduated high school with a 3.57 gpa, a lot of volunteer work, and many extracurricular activities. I was in several offices in different clubs, as well as did sports. My only weakness were my test scores. At the very start, I was always terrible at test taking skills. Thus, resulted in having a low SAT score. I figured since my gpa is pretty high and have a lot of points on my resume, my test scores would balance out on the decision of my acceptance. In the end, I was rejected from VCU due to my SAT score. After realizing that it was not a fair decision, I appealed the decision and finally got accepted to VCU. I feel like this is a big issue across the nation for many universities, because by accepting a student depending on their test score does not make the student a well rounded person. Universities should look at the student for that objective rather than a test score that is only based on math and english.

5 royal princesses

My family consists of 5 girls. 5 girls in a row. In America, that may seem a lot, and not that big of a deal. However, back home in Vietnam, having 5 girls in a row is extremely rare, and so they have a saying of "ngu long cong chua". That means 5 royal princesses. When a family has 5 girls in a row, everyone will see the family as a royal family, and they will respect that family as if it was royal. It has it's advantages as well as its disadvantages. Advantages because everyone in the vietnamese community know who you are, and everything about you. The disadvantages are that since everyone knows you, they talk about you. So if you were to do something bad and they see it, the word spreads around the community, and the reputation of the family is ruined. Thus, my family has a lot of pressure to keep a good reputation in order to not be talked about. Being a part of the 5 royal princesses in the vietnamese community is somewhat very different for me. Since I'm the baby of the 5 royal princesses, it's my job to keep the reputation going for my family as well as my older sisters. It's a tendency for the baby one to lose the reputation easily, and so there's more pressure put on me as well. =/

How do you not know that you're pregnant?

Yesterday night, I was watching tv and came across a show on the discovery health channel. The show was "I didn't know I was pregnant". When I saw that title, I thought to myself, now how in the world do you not know that you're pregnant? Obviously, you'd feel the baby moving in your stomach, or you'd gain weight, or have all these signs out there telling you that you are pregnant. Apparently, it could happen. There were so many stories of women having the case of not knowing they were even pregnant. One of them was about a women who was petite, and stayed petite even when she had her baby. There wasn't even a bump on your stomach to show she was even pregnant. I was completely amazed when the baby was born, because it was pretty big, so why didn't it show on her belly? She also had her monthly "period" that she thought was her monthly period, when really it was her pregnancy spots of bleeding. I really thought it was interesting that this could even happen to a women. What if she didn't intend to be pregnant, when in reality, she was.

Favorite talk show host

So I've discovered my all time favorite talk show host recently. It's the Ellen Degeneres Show. I never realized how much I would like her, until I watched many of her shows, and could never get enough of them. She's extremely one of a kind, and that's what I love about her. As humble and hilarious as she is, she never tries too hard to be. Everything she says, I don't know why, but I laugh all the time. It's weird, but I really do enjoy watching her. She's not as serious as Oprah, but she still gets through interviewing celebrities, as well as having fun in her show. Every show she does, she would always dance at the beginning of each show. She'd also have games and competitions that are always funny, like blindfold musical chairs. She's not like any other comedian that tries too hard to be funny, when they're not. So if you've never seen one her shows, you must =)

Seting a goal

In life, one must set a goal in order to be successful. When a goal is set, you have something to look forward to, and when you achieve it, you feel extremely good about yourself. It's somewhat a challenge between you and your brain, because you must be motivated and dedicated in order to accomplish it. Currently, I've had a goal set since the year began. It was my resolution, and is now my goal. It is to lose weight and be healthier. I'm doing very well so far, and I'm extremely proud of myself. I've given up on a lot of bad food, and have eaten so much healthier than I ever did in my lifetime. I've also lost 15 lbs, and is still continuing to lose more. Although it's not much just yet, but I'm still very proud of myself, and I definitely do feel much better about myself. All it takes is some motivation, moderation, and dedication, and anyone can achieve anything that they wish to be able to achieve. <3

How fast kids grow

So this weekend, we're celebrating my first nephew's 8th birthday. I can't believe he's already 8 years old. It seems like it was just yesterday when he was just born, and I held him in my arms. It may sound like he's like my own child, but he's my baby. He is the first nephew in our family, and so he's definitely more spoiled than the other nephews and nieces. I feel like I connect with him the most because he was the nephew that I took care of basically his whole life. I took care of him when he was a newborn till he was about 3 or 4 years old. Time really does go by very fast, and it's amazing how fast kids grow up these days. I keep telling him that I don't want him to grow up anymore, because the next thing I know, he won't want to talk to his aunt anymore. He'll be too held up with his friends and possibly a girlfriend in his teenage years, that I won't matter as much to him anymore. It totally sucks, but it's life, and I must deal with it for all my nephews and nieces. So for those who do have children, or little ones in your family, make sure you spend good quality time with them, because time really does go by quickly. Cherish those moments =)

Living alone

I've recently started living alone back in September for the first time in my life. I've always lived with my parents, but never really depended on them. I started to become very independent when I reached 14 years old, and since then, I've learned to rely mainly on myself. So currently, I live on my own in an apartment not too far from campus. Even though my parent's home is about 30 minutes away, I didn't want to commute such a far distance everyday. Living alone has been very good lately, and I'm beginning to love it. At first, I was extremely scared and lonely, and really missed home, but now I've gotten used to it, and have grown up a lot. I've learned to be come responsible for my actions, and my lifestyle. Paying my own bills, cleaning up after my mess, and buying everything with my own money. Living independently gives me a lot more freedom and privacy than I had when I lived with my parents. I was never allowed out late at night, nor hang out with my friends. So now when I live alone, I'm allowed to do what I want, without having to be afraid of my parents. I realize that I am an adult now, and no longer a child =)

Overcoming fears

Everyone has one, and it's a fear that you've had all your life. I have many fears, so much it's not enough to list. One of them is the fear of dogs and animals in general. I don't understand why I do, but I just do. Learning in Psychology class, to be fear of something means you must've been conditioned to when you were young. Thus, I must've been conditioned to be scared of dogs when I was chased by one when I was very little. I remember walking down the neighborhood with my sister when we were kids, and I could remember seeing this giant dog in the distance being walked by a kid. The kid somehow knew I was scared of it, and decided to let it go from its leash, which led it to chasing me around the neighborhood. It was defnitely bigger than me at the time so I was extremely scared it might eat me up. After being chased by the huge dog, the owner took it back, and since then, I've been scared of dogs my whole life. Surprisingly, over Spring Break, I over came my fear. I stayed at my friend's house that had 2 dogs, so I had to deal with it no matter what. He taught me how to not be scared of it anymore, and in the end, I grew very attached to them. I'm happy that I overcame my fear because it had to be done sometime soon. Being afraid of dogs have kept me from doing many things in the past, like going to friend's houses, but not it's not an excuse for me anymore =)

So much to do in so little time

I don't know if it's just me, or if it goes for everyone else in this world, but lately it feels like there is not enough time in a day to be able to do everything you need to do. I only wish there was much more hours than just 24 in a day, because I feel like I don't have enough time to even finish everything that's needed to be done. Is it because I've been procrastinating? Or is it because I have way too much stuff to do. I will admit that I do procrastinate on things, but that still means that my life is too short to be stressing over schoolwork constantly. I have so many things going on in my life, and the majority of it revolves around schoolwork. Yes schoolwork is fairly important, but it shouldn't be the only thing in one's life. So if there was a possibility of changing the hours in one day, I'd definitely change it. Perhaps to at least 30 hours a day. That way, I'd have enough time to get things done in one day, rather than waiting it off to the next day, and rushing through to get things done on time =)

Life goes on

Recently, I heard a popular song on the radio by Leanne Rimes called "Life Goes On". After having serious thoughts, I've come to realize that life really does go on, and there is no time to wait on the past and live on the past. We must move on and live for the future. Throughout my whole life, I've always relied on the past and took the past as my judgment for the future. Life is too short and too valuable to keep relying on the past. The past has already been done and gone, and there is no need to keep thinking about it. Whatever has happened, has happened already, and it's finally time to move on. Move on for the future and move on for my own sake. The longer the past lingers in your head, the more difficult your future will be to pursue. So as I speak for myself as for those who still lives on their past, we all must move on, because life really does go on, and there's so much more out there waiting for us to accomplish. There is no time in life to rely on the past, for it has already been done and over with =)

Everything happens for a reason

Sometime in your life, someone has told you that everything always happen for a reason. Believe it or not, it's true. I never really realized it until I started growing up, and faced the cruelty of this world. Facing the responsibilities for my actions as well as facing the obstacles that I must go through as an adult. When I look back at it now, all that has happened to me throughout my life makes sense now even when it didn't back then. For instance, my recent breakup with this guy I've been with for awhile. Although it was hard to do so and very painful, I had to break up with him because of some circumstances that crossed the line. I was very mad at myself at first, but as I start to think about it now, I'm glad I made that choice. I was too young to know what love was, and I definitely needed to concentrate in school first. So whether or not you choose to believe that everything does happen for a reason, it really does if you think deeply about it =)

So ready for Spring

We've spent way too long in the cold weather, and I'm beginning to get really sick of it. I don't usually like cold weather, but then again, I don't really like hot weather. So I fall more into the Spring and Fall weathers: the medium, just perfect weather. Lately, we've been having really nice conditions, and I've been loving it. The temperatures fall in between 60s and 70s and it's the best. So as you can tell, I'm really ready for spring and I'm counting down the days. I'm counting down the days for beautiful flowers blossoming everywhere, butterflies fluttering everywhere, and being able to run outside everyday. I'm also ready to being able to wear nicer clothes, instead of just hoodies and sweatshirts everyday. And last but not least, I'm ready to get darker! =) Silly as it sounds, I'm pale as anything, and I always wait till springtime to get a little tan for some color just to be able to wear some shorts, skirts, or dresses hehe! So winter needs to go, and spring needs to hurry and come for all of us here =)

What am I doing during Springbreak?

I just recently got back from a trip to NOVA, and I had a lot of fun. After visiting Washington D.C, I went to the National Zoo. Surprisingly, I've never been to a zoo, so this was a good experience and a lot of fun. I've got to see animals that I've never seen before. Spring break has been relaxing lately, but I need to kick back into the studying mode as soon as possible. I still have a lot of things to do, a lot of studying to do, unfortunately. However, I can't seem to, because I also have a lot of things on my mind and other things to worry about as well. A lot of things are happening in April, and I'm currently preparing for them. I've been getting ready for my trip to Michigan in less than a month, and I'm stoked! After my trip, it's my sister's and my dad's birthday. I have yet to know what to get them, so I'm contemplating. Then my little niece is born!! My first niece ever! I'm extremely excited. I can't wait to see her when we go up to the New York. After that, my little nephew has his First Communion ceremony at his school. So many things are happening in my life, and I have so much to worry about. On top of that, I have school as well, and it's beginning to become very stressful, but I'm not going to let it get to that extreme. =)

Washington D.C

For spring break, I visited northern VA to visit some friends, and to visit some areas that I haven't been to in a long time. So today, I went to visit Washington D.C. I haven't been back here since I was about 7 years old, and I've forgotten how the area looked like. I've also forgotten how it feels to be in this historical presence. We first visited the Jefferson Memorial. After Jefferson Memorial, we visited the Washington Monument. We thought about going inside, but we didn't have the energy to walk up the monument =/. Then we went to see the WWII memorial, which I've never seen. It was heart felting to be in the memorial of the those that died in WWII. We then walked down the mall strip where Martin Luther King Jr gave his speech. Behind the mall strip stands the Lincoln Memorial. I've never seen the memorial with in real life, so it was something very important to me. Through looking at the pictures in history books, I always thought Lincoln was much smaller. But after seeing it in real life, he was huge! After visiting Lincoln, we visited the Vietnam Veteran Memorial. It was very nice to visit this memorial particularly because it's the war that's most important to me. I had a lot of fun today and I recommend those that never been to D.C should definitely go. =)

Spring Break starts

As soon as this day ends, my spring break starts. I'm a little excited, but a little scared. Excited that I will be going to DC to spend a few days relaxing. Maybe do some shopping, some sight seeing, and a lot of eating! =) On the other hand, I'm a little scared because I know I have so much schoolwork that I'm going to have to do before school starts again. Once school starts again, I have a 3 exams, a quiz, a book report due, and homework from every class. I would think that spring break is when I can leave my brain on campus and not have anything to worry about, but obviously I was wrong. No matter where you go, school work will always follow you =/ In the end, I have to just deal with it. So as I speak for myself and others as well, I hope everyone has a great spring break. Where ever you are, whether it's out of state or home, enjoy it while it lasts. It's only a week, but make sure you have some time to relax your brain as well as your body. Take care everyone, and Ms. Shaffer, enjoy San Francisco!! =)

Chuck-e-Cheese

So today, I took my nephews to their all time favorite place, Chuck-E-Cheese. For those of you who might not know what chuck-e-cheese is, it's basically an arcade with a lot of games for kids. My nephews love this place because they get to win tickets which you can trade in for toys depending on how much points you get. As I was sitting there watching my nephews as well as the other kids around playing the games, I start to realize that kids these days can get pretty competitive. Even at little ages, they understand what it means to lose or win, and I was extremely amazed by that. Even though this place is known to just have fun and enjoy the games, I notice that the majority of the kids that are there are only there to receive as much tickets as possible to get little toys that you can buy for $1 at local stores. #1 example are my nephews. Each nephew had equal amount of tokens, 125 each. But it depends on how you play the games in order to receive the amount of tickets. After all the tokens were used up, my nephews compared each others tickets to see who had the most. My little nephew ended up with the most, which meant that his older brother became extremely angry. He started a fit and of course, started crying. Just at the age of 7 and 6, they already know that losing doesn't feel good. It's quite interesting to understand how the mind of each age works psychologically. =)

Lack of communication

It is very typical for an asian family to have lack of communication in their household. It is hard to say what the reason is for that, but in this particular case, my family is a great example of it. I love my parents more than anything in this world, but the only thing I wish to change between us is the communication that we have. My parents are great when it comes to pushing my siblings and I to study hard and do well in school, however, they are not so great in guiding us through the life outside of school. I believe this is the reason because they were raised in a different country, and my siblings and I are basically americanize. Thus, the 2 culture and beliefs are entirely different and they collide when they meet. So when I have a problem in my life, my parents are never the first people I go to to vent. I go to my sisters. If I had ever gone to my parents to talk, they'll never understand the situation, and they'll eventually turn the tables and make matters worse than they already are. I get extremely sad when I hear my friends tell me that their parents are their best friends and that they can talk to them about anything. I only wish that I can have that connection as well with my parents, because I know that someday, they won't be here anymore and I would be extremely regretful realizing that I was never that close to my parents as I wish I could have been. They are the best parents that I can ever imagine, but I just wish they can understand that we no longer live in Vietnam, and that the century has changed. However, no matter how hard I try explaining to them that, they'll never budge and they will never change their traditional beliefs.

The trip that changed my life

It's very rare for me to have the chance to travel. I never have the opportunity to go on vacations because it's either I can't, no money, or I don't have the time to go. Surprisingly, my first trip ever was the trip that changed my life completely and how my perspective on life since then. In 2005, I took a trip to my home country where I was born, Vietnam. Since I left Vietnam, which was when I was only 2 years old, I've never been back. I don't remember anything about it, and I don't know anything about my country except through what I hear and pictures. Therefore, my parents along with 2 of my sisters went. As soon as I stepped down from the plane onto Vietnam's soil, I instantly felt a rush through my adrenaline. I immediately felt scared and worried that I would not be able to make it through the entire month here. I was so used to the lifestyle in America, that I wasn't sure I could handle the different conditions and climate in Vietnam. Everything was completely different. My relatives live in a village that is very small and very poor. Everything is dirty, no bathrooms, nothing to do, and extremely dusty. At first, I honestly couldn't do it, but as time went on, I got used to it. After the entire month I spent there, I gained an entire new perspective on life. I was so used to the lifestyle with everything presented to me on a silver platter. But after living in a different world for just a month, I realize that I cannot take life for granted, and that I should appreciate everything that I have because the people that I love back home, do not have anything. I am grateful for every second of everyday that I live, and I would not change it for a thing. =)

Teaching

I honestly love children, and I love being around them. Any opportunities that get me to be around them, I'd take it in a second. I love how they make me so happy, and how they all have different personalities. Not only do they keep me young, but they also let me view life on a different perspective. So I took on a volunteer job as a teacher at my local church. I taught there for about 3 years, and I truly could not have been happier with it. My students ranged from ages 6-8, and at those ages, they really do have amazing opinions as well as silly personalities. I looked forward to every week coming into the classroom, just to await for hugs from every one of them. Each hug warmed my heart and after every hug I received, nothing mattered for the rest of the day to me. I loved their silly jokes, and the goofy things they did. For instance, they made a song for me, and everytime they sang it to me, I'd laugh hysterically. As of now, I currently don't teach anymore. I really do miss it a lot, and I miss all of my students. Although I see them regularly in church, but I don't have that one to one connection to them anymore. That is why I took on the role of volunteering at the children's hospital. =)