Feeling the stress coming

Just when I thought I had things under control with school, a load of assignments, projects, exams are given to me all at once. I'm completely overwhelm and I don't know what to do at this point. Besides having to find 16 sources for our 2000 words 5-7 page research paper to do, I have a statistics project to do in Stat class, 2 exams next week, 1 quiz next week. I also have to look up classes to register for next year, as well as getting on track with the Dental Hygiene program at ODU. It seems like I complain a lot, but when you have this much to do all at the same time, you don't know what else to do but to complain. The fact there's not enough hours per day makes it even harder. There are times when I wish I could just drop out, but I know that wouldn't solve anything. I only wished that my teachers had given us these huge assignments earlier in the school year so that we'd have a lot of time to work on it rather than struggling the last few weeks of the school year to do them =/

Stressful summer ahead

It's been since 1st grade that I've been to summer school. I've only had to take summer school after 1st grade because of ESL (English as a Second Language). Other than that, I've spent my summers relaxing and having fun. So this summer, I've decided to take summer classes, only to try to get ahead a little bit. The hardest prerequisites that I have to take is Anatomy and Physiology I and II. So I want to get it out of the way this summer, and take it. One thing that's holding me back is that if I do decide to take it here at ODU, it'll be a rough summer for me, because classes are 3 hours long Monday through Friday. Then the labs are 2 hour long. Also, the cost is very expensive, and Financial Aid doesn't cover summer classes. Social life will be gone for me and I will never have time for anything. That's why I'm thinking about taking the classes at TCC, where it's much more relaxing on the classes, and much cheaper. I'm hoping I can, because it'll help me out much more on top of many things I have to do this summer as well. I'm my sister's wedding planner, so I have many wedding things that I have to do for my sister. So while everyone is relaxing and enjoying their summer, I am going to be very stressed out dealing with a lot of things =/

Family image

I was born into a family that cares deeply of their image. When I say image, I mean from our looks to our reputation, and to the entire family's reputation. It really does suck at some level because my parents doesn't care about our happiness, but rather than their image and what their friends think about our family. For example, if I want to do something, like dye my hair, I'm strictly not allowed to because other people might think that I'm wild and that my parents raised me to be a disappointment. So talking about this subject, my sisters and I, being girls, are extremely pressured to look good, and act good. The fact that we are asians, it leaves us a total disadvantage when it comes to our weight because Asians are typically tiny and petite. So the fact that my older sister and I were basically raised here in America, eating American's food, we are a little bigger than the typical asian size. I don't like it when I'm compared to other asian girls, because I feel like this is who I am, and I shouldn't have to change myself and try to be someone else. Thus, because our weight, my parents are ashamed our my sister and I, and feel embarrassed everytime their friends meet us. It saddens me to the point that I feel like I don't know my parents anymore. Sometimes I think they're so selfish into the "family image" and their pride, that they don't see what and how it's affecting both my sister and I.

Homeless moment

While driving back home to Virginia Beach today, I stopped at a stoplight and waited for the color to turn from red to green on the traffic sign. The light seemed to take forever, so I started to glance around my surroundings and noticed an old homeless man digging in a nearby trashcan for food. I immediately felt an emotion running through, because I've never really realized how many homeless people there were in United States. I've only seen so many back home in Vietnam, and that was typical and obvious, especially from an extreme poor country. But United States is considered the wealthiest country in the world, so how can there be so many homeless? It was heartbreaking to see that old man slowly digging through trash one by one looking for food. An old man who's lived half his life already. I thought to myself, why doesn't he better his life and go out there to find a job? There are so many opportunities out there, so why doesn't he take the time to search for some? It's not like he has anything else to do during the day. Seeing this man made me realize how important life is to anyone.

Monarch mentor

Soon I'll become a Monarch Mentor, and I'm a little excited to be one. We'll be doing a lot of training, group trips, and activities that involves a lot of social benefits. This helps my resume, as well my social endurance. I'm a shy quiet person, and so this will definitely help me break out of my shell. I'll be able to meet many different diversity groups, and learn a lot of from them. It'll allow me to open up more to different cultures, as well as to those of my ethnicity. I've worked as being a mentor before back in high school in the Big Brother Big Sister program, so I know what it takes to be a good mentor and how to connect with those that are in need of help. =)

Issue proposal

For my issue proposal on our final papers, I've decided to write about how universities decide on accepting new students. Whether it's based on the grade point average, extracurricular activities, or SATs/ACTs scores, different universities have different ways on making their decisions. When I applied for college, my first choice was VCU. That was the first school I applied to, and I knew for sure I'd get in. I graduated high school with a 3.57 gpa, a lot of volunteer work, and many extracurricular activities. I was in several offices in different clubs, as well as did sports. My only weakness were my test scores. At the very start, I was always terrible at test taking skills. Thus, resulted in having a low SAT score. I figured since my gpa is pretty high and have a lot of points on my resume, my test scores would balance out on the decision of my acceptance. In the end, I was rejected from VCU due to my SAT score. After realizing that it was not a fair decision, I appealed the decision and finally got accepted to VCU. I feel like this is a big issue across the nation for many universities, because by accepting a student depending on their test score does not make the student a well rounded person. Universities should look at the student for that objective rather than a test score that is only based on math and english.

5 royal princesses

My family consists of 5 girls. 5 girls in a row. In America, that may seem a lot, and not that big of a deal. However, back home in Vietnam, having 5 girls in a row is extremely rare, and so they have a saying of "ngu long cong chua". That means 5 royal princesses. When a family has 5 girls in a row, everyone will see the family as a royal family, and they will respect that family as if it was royal. It has it's advantages as well as its disadvantages. Advantages because everyone in the vietnamese community know who you are, and everything about you. The disadvantages are that since everyone knows you, they talk about you. So if you were to do something bad and they see it, the word spreads around the community, and the reputation of the family is ruined. Thus, my family has a lot of pressure to keep a good reputation in order to not be talked about. Being a part of the 5 royal princesses in the vietnamese community is somewhat very different for me. Since I'm the baby of the 5 royal princesses, it's my job to keep the reputation going for my family as well as my older sisters. It's a tendency for the baby one to lose the reputation easily, and so there's more pressure put on me as well. =/

How do you not know that you're pregnant?

Yesterday night, I was watching tv and came across a show on the discovery health channel. The show was "I didn't know I was pregnant". When I saw that title, I thought to myself, now how in the world do you not know that you're pregnant? Obviously, you'd feel the baby moving in your stomach, or you'd gain weight, or have all these signs out there telling you that you are pregnant. Apparently, it could happen. There were so many stories of women having the case of not knowing they were even pregnant. One of them was about a women who was petite, and stayed petite even when she had her baby. There wasn't even a bump on your stomach to show she was even pregnant. I was completely amazed when the baby was born, because it was pretty big, so why didn't it show on her belly? She also had her monthly "period" that she thought was her monthly period, when really it was her pregnancy spots of bleeding. I really thought it was interesting that this could even happen to a women. What if she didn't intend to be pregnant, when in reality, she was.

Favorite talk show host

So I've discovered my all time favorite talk show host recently. It's the Ellen Degeneres Show. I never realized how much I would like her, until I watched many of her shows, and could never get enough of them. She's extremely one of a kind, and that's what I love about her. As humble and hilarious as she is, she never tries too hard to be. Everything she says, I don't know why, but I laugh all the time. It's weird, but I really do enjoy watching her. She's not as serious as Oprah, but she still gets through interviewing celebrities, as well as having fun in her show. Every show she does, she would always dance at the beginning of each show. She'd also have games and competitions that are always funny, like blindfold musical chairs. She's not like any other comedian that tries too hard to be funny, when they're not. So if you've never seen one her shows, you must =)

Seting a goal

In life, one must set a goal in order to be successful. When a goal is set, you have something to look forward to, and when you achieve it, you feel extremely good about yourself. It's somewhat a challenge between you and your brain, because you must be motivated and dedicated in order to accomplish it. Currently, I've had a goal set since the year began. It was my resolution, and is now my goal. It is to lose weight and be healthier. I'm doing very well so far, and I'm extremely proud of myself. I've given up on a lot of bad food, and have eaten so much healthier than I ever did in my lifetime. I've also lost 15 lbs, and is still continuing to lose more. Although it's not much just yet, but I'm still very proud of myself, and I definitely do feel much better about myself. All it takes is some motivation, moderation, and dedication, and anyone can achieve anything that they wish to be able to achieve. <3

How fast kids grow

So this weekend, we're celebrating my first nephew's 8th birthday. I can't believe he's already 8 years old. It seems like it was just yesterday when he was just born, and I held him in my arms. It may sound like he's like my own child, but he's my baby. He is the first nephew in our family, and so he's definitely more spoiled than the other nephews and nieces. I feel like I connect with him the most because he was the nephew that I took care of basically his whole life. I took care of him when he was a newborn till he was about 3 or 4 years old. Time really does go by very fast, and it's amazing how fast kids grow up these days. I keep telling him that I don't want him to grow up anymore, because the next thing I know, he won't want to talk to his aunt anymore. He'll be too held up with his friends and possibly a girlfriend in his teenage years, that I won't matter as much to him anymore. It totally sucks, but it's life, and I must deal with it for all my nephews and nieces. So for those who do have children, or little ones in your family, make sure you spend good quality time with them, because time really does go by quickly. Cherish those moments =)

Living alone

I've recently started living alone back in September for the first time in my life. I've always lived with my parents, but never really depended on them. I started to become very independent when I reached 14 years old, and since then, I've learned to rely mainly on myself. So currently, I live on my own in an apartment not too far from campus. Even though my parent's home is about 30 minutes away, I didn't want to commute such a far distance everyday. Living alone has been very good lately, and I'm beginning to love it. At first, I was extremely scared and lonely, and really missed home, but now I've gotten used to it, and have grown up a lot. I've learned to be come responsible for my actions, and my lifestyle. Paying my own bills, cleaning up after my mess, and buying everything with my own money. Living independently gives me a lot more freedom and privacy than I had when I lived with my parents. I was never allowed out late at night, nor hang out with my friends. So now when I live alone, I'm allowed to do what I want, without having to be afraid of my parents. I realize that I am an adult now, and no longer a child =)

Overcoming fears

Everyone has one, and it's a fear that you've had all your life. I have many fears, so much it's not enough to list. One of them is the fear of dogs and animals in general. I don't understand why I do, but I just do. Learning in Psychology class, to be fear of something means you must've been conditioned to when you were young. Thus, I must've been conditioned to be scared of dogs when I was chased by one when I was very little. I remember walking down the neighborhood with my sister when we were kids, and I could remember seeing this giant dog in the distance being walked by a kid. The kid somehow knew I was scared of it, and decided to let it go from its leash, which led it to chasing me around the neighborhood. It was defnitely bigger than me at the time so I was extremely scared it might eat me up. After being chased by the huge dog, the owner took it back, and since then, I've been scared of dogs my whole life. Surprisingly, over Spring Break, I over came my fear. I stayed at my friend's house that had 2 dogs, so I had to deal with it no matter what. He taught me how to not be scared of it anymore, and in the end, I grew very attached to them. I'm happy that I overcame my fear because it had to be done sometime soon. Being afraid of dogs have kept me from doing many things in the past, like going to friend's houses, but not it's not an excuse for me anymore =)

So much to do in so little time

I don't know if it's just me, or if it goes for everyone else in this world, but lately it feels like there is not enough time in a day to be able to do everything you need to do. I only wish there was much more hours than just 24 in a day, because I feel like I don't have enough time to even finish everything that's needed to be done. Is it because I've been procrastinating? Or is it because I have way too much stuff to do. I will admit that I do procrastinate on things, but that still means that my life is too short to be stressing over schoolwork constantly. I have so many things going on in my life, and the majority of it revolves around schoolwork. Yes schoolwork is fairly important, but it shouldn't be the only thing in one's life. So if there was a possibility of changing the hours in one day, I'd definitely change it. Perhaps to at least 30 hours a day. That way, I'd have enough time to get things done in one day, rather than waiting it off to the next day, and rushing through to get things done on time =)

Life goes on

Recently, I heard a popular song on the radio by Leanne Rimes called "Life Goes On". After having serious thoughts, I've come to realize that life really does go on, and there is no time to wait on the past and live on the past. We must move on and live for the future. Throughout my whole life, I've always relied on the past and took the past as my judgment for the future. Life is too short and too valuable to keep relying on the past. The past has already been done and gone, and there is no need to keep thinking about it. Whatever has happened, has happened already, and it's finally time to move on. Move on for the future and move on for my own sake. The longer the past lingers in your head, the more difficult your future will be to pursue. So as I speak for myself as for those who still lives on their past, we all must move on, because life really does go on, and there's so much more out there waiting for us to accomplish. There is no time in life to rely on the past, for it has already been done and over with =)

Everything happens for a reason

Sometime in your life, someone has told you that everything always happen for a reason. Believe it or not, it's true. I never really realized it until I started growing up, and faced the cruelty of this world. Facing the responsibilities for my actions as well as facing the obstacles that I must go through as an adult. When I look back at it now, all that has happened to me throughout my life makes sense now even when it didn't back then. For instance, my recent breakup with this guy I've been with for awhile. Although it was hard to do so and very painful, I had to break up with him because of some circumstances that crossed the line. I was very mad at myself at first, but as I start to think about it now, I'm glad I made that choice. I was too young to know what love was, and I definitely needed to concentrate in school first. So whether or not you choose to believe that everything does happen for a reason, it really does if you think deeply about it =)

So ready for Spring

We've spent way too long in the cold weather, and I'm beginning to get really sick of it. I don't usually like cold weather, but then again, I don't really like hot weather. So I fall more into the Spring and Fall weathers: the medium, just perfect weather. Lately, we've been having really nice conditions, and I've been loving it. The temperatures fall in between 60s and 70s and it's the best. So as you can tell, I'm really ready for spring and I'm counting down the days. I'm counting down the days for beautiful flowers blossoming everywhere, butterflies fluttering everywhere, and being able to run outside everyday. I'm also ready to being able to wear nicer clothes, instead of just hoodies and sweatshirts everyday. And last but not least, I'm ready to get darker! =) Silly as it sounds, I'm pale as anything, and I always wait till springtime to get a little tan for some color just to be able to wear some shorts, skirts, or dresses hehe! So winter needs to go, and spring needs to hurry and come for all of us here =)

What am I doing during Springbreak?

I just recently got back from a trip to NOVA, and I had a lot of fun. After visiting Washington D.C, I went to the National Zoo. Surprisingly, I've never been to a zoo, so this was a good experience and a lot of fun. I've got to see animals that I've never seen before. Spring break has been relaxing lately, but I need to kick back into the studying mode as soon as possible. I still have a lot of things to do, a lot of studying to do, unfortunately. However, I can't seem to, because I also have a lot of things on my mind and other things to worry about as well. A lot of things are happening in April, and I'm currently preparing for them. I've been getting ready for my trip to Michigan in less than a month, and I'm stoked! After my trip, it's my sister's and my dad's birthday. I have yet to know what to get them, so I'm contemplating. Then my little niece is born!! My first niece ever! I'm extremely excited. I can't wait to see her when we go up to the New York. After that, my little nephew has his First Communion ceremony at his school. So many things are happening in my life, and I have so much to worry about. On top of that, I have school as well, and it's beginning to become very stressful, but I'm not going to let it get to that extreme. =)

Washington D.C

For spring break, I visited northern VA to visit some friends, and to visit some areas that I haven't been to in a long time. So today, I went to visit Washington D.C. I haven't been back here since I was about 7 years old, and I've forgotten how the area looked like. I've also forgotten how it feels to be in this historical presence. We first visited the Jefferson Memorial. After Jefferson Memorial, we visited the Washington Monument. We thought about going inside, but we didn't have the energy to walk up the monument =/. Then we went to see the WWII memorial, which I've never seen. It was heart felting to be in the memorial of the those that died in WWII. We then walked down the mall strip where Martin Luther King Jr gave his speech. Behind the mall strip stands the Lincoln Memorial. I've never seen the memorial with in real life, so it was something very important to me. Through looking at the pictures in history books, I always thought Lincoln was much smaller. But after seeing it in real life, he was huge! After visiting Lincoln, we visited the Vietnam Veteran Memorial. It was very nice to visit this memorial particularly because it's the war that's most important to me. I had a lot of fun today and I recommend those that never been to D.C should definitely go. =)

Spring Break starts

As soon as this day ends, my spring break starts. I'm a little excited, but a little scared. Excited that I will be going to DC to spend a few days relaxing. Maybe do some shopping, some sight seeing, and a lot of eating! =) On the other hand, I'm a little scared because I know I have so much schoolwork that I'm going to have to do before school starts again. Once school starts again, I have a 3 exams, a quiz, a book report due, and homework from every class. I would think that spring break is when I can leave my brain on campus and not have anything to worry about, but obviously I was wrong. No matter where you go, school work will always follow you =/ In the end, I have to just deal with it. So as I speak for myself and others as well, I hope everyone has a great spring break. Where ever you are, whether it's out of state or home, enjoy it while it lasts. It's only a week, but make sure you have some time to relax your brain as well as your body. Take care everyone, and Ms. Shaffer, enjoy San Francisco!! =)

Chuck-e-Cheese

So today, I took my nephews to their all time favorite place, Chuck-E-Cheese. For those of you who might not know what chuck-e-cheese is, it's basically an arcade with a lot of games for kids. My nephews love this place because they get to win tickets which you can trade in for toys depending on how much points you get. As I was sitting there watching my nephews as well as the other kids around playing the games, I start to realize that kids these days can get pretty competitive. Even at little ages, they understand what it means to lose or win, and I was extremely amazed by that. Even though this place is known to just have fun and enjoy the games, I notice that the majority of the kids that are there are only there to receive as much tickets as possible to get little toys that you can buy for $1 at local stores. #1 example are my nephews. Each nephew had equal amount of tokens, 125 each. But it depends on how you play the games in order to receive the amount of tickets. After all the tokens were used up, my nephews compared each others tickets to see who had the most. My little nephew ended up with the most, which meant that his older brother became extremely angry. He started a fit and of course, started crying. Just at the age of 7 and 6, they already know that losing doesn't feel good. It's quite interesting to understand how the mind of each age works psychologically. =)

Lack of communication

It is very typical for an asian family to have lack of communication in their household. It is hard to say what the reason is for that, but in this particular case, my family is a great example of it. I love my parents more than anything in this world, but the only thing I wish to change between us is the communication that we have. My parents are great when it comes to pushing my siblings and I to study hard and do well in school, however, they are not so great in guiding us through the life outside of school. I believe this is the reason because they were raised in a different country, and my siblings and I are basically americanize. Thus, the 2 culture and beliefs are entirely different and they collide when they meet. So when I have a problem in my life, my parents are never the first people I go to to vent. I go to my sisters. If I had ever gone to my parents to talk, they'll never understand the situation, and they'll eventually turn the tables and make matters worse than they already are. I get extremely sad when I hear my friends tell me that their parents are their best friends and that they can talk to them about anything. I only wish that I can have that connection as well with my parents, because I know that someday, they won't be here anymore and I would be extremely regretful realizing that I was never that close to my parents as I wish I could have been. They are the best parents that I can ever imagine, but I just wish they can understand that we no longer live in Vietnam, and that the century has changed. However, no matter how hard I try explaining to them that, they'll never budge and they will never change their traditional beliefs.

The trip that changed my life

It's very rare for me to have the chance to travel. I never have the opportunity to go on vacations because it's either I can't, no money, or I don't have the time to go. Surprisingly, my first trip ever was the trip that changed my life completely and how my perspective on life since then. In 2005, I took a trip to my home country where I was born, Vietnam. Since I left Vietnam, which was when I was only 2 years old, I've never been back. I don't remember anything about it, and I don't know anything about my country except through what I hear and pictures. Therefore, my parents along with 2 of my sisters went. As soon as I stepped down from the plane onto Vietnam's soil, I instantly felt a rush through my adrenaline. I immediately felt scared and worried that I would not be able to make it through the entire month here. I was so used to the lifestyle in America, that I wasn't sure I could handle the different conditions and climate in Vietnam. Everything was completely different. My relatives live in a village that is very small and very poor. Everything is dirty, no bathrooms, nothing to do, and extremely dusty. At first, I honestly couldn't do it, but as time went on, I got used to it. After the entire month I spent there, I gained an entire new perspective on life. I was so used to the lifestyle with everything presented to me on a silver platter. But after living in a different world for just a month, I realize that I cannot take life for granted, and that I should appreciate everything that I have because the people that I love back home, do not have anything. I am grateful for every second of everyday that I live, and I would not change it for a thing. =)

Teaching

I honestly love children, and I love being around them. Any opportunities that get me to be around them, I'd take it in a second. I love how they make me so happy, and how they all have different personalities. Not only do they keep me young, but they also let me view life on a different perspective. So I took on a volunteer job as a teacher at my local church. I taught there for about 3 years, and I truly could not have been happier with it. My students ranged from ages 6-8, and at those ages, they really do have amazing opinions as well as silly personalities. I looked forward to every week coming into the classroom, just to await for hugs from every one of them. Each hug warmed my heart and after every hug I received, nothing mattered for the rest of the day to me. I loved their silly jokes, and the goofy things they did. For instance, they made a song for me, and everytime they sang it to me, I'd laugh hysterically. As of now, I currently don't teach anymore. I really do miss it a lot, and I miss all of my students. Although I see them regularly in church, but I don't have that one to one connection to them anymore. That is why I took on the role of volunteering at the children's hospital. =)

The year 2009

2009 have been going very well so far for me. Now I don't want to jinx it or anything, but it really has, and I'm looking forward to continue the year with the same perspective. I've taken the opportunity for the new year to change who I am and to be a better person both inside and out. Last year was not so great. I was always sad, depressed, and stressed out for any reason that comes upon me. And for those reasons, my body reflected on it, and I gained a significant amount of weight and I was very unhappy. So when 2009 came, I had to change. I began to exercise everyday, as well as eat healthier, which affected my personality and mentality. I lost the weight I gained and am continuing it. I've also became a much happier person. I love being happy and I love my life right now. I have so much to look forward to this year. So many things are happening, and I'm extremely excited. My future niece is due very soon, which means I will be taking a trip to NY to visit! Then, my sister's boyfriend is graduating from medical school, so that'll be another trip to either NY or NJ! Then he's going to graduate from Bible School (converting to catholic), so that's another trip to Michigan! Then in the summer, I'm planning to take a trip to Miami for vacation, and then after that, head on over to Texas because my brother is moving there. After all those trips, we may have an engagement party for one of my sister by the end of the year. So that'll probably be a trip to California! I'm extremely excited and cannot wait to take all the those trips and have all the fun I can possibly have. =)

Lent Season

So it's lent season, and you're probably wondering what is lent? In christian and catholic religions, lent is a forty day long season of fasting and praying before Easter. I won't go into deep details of what lent is, and its origins only for religious reasons. But because of my religion, I must participate in this season every year. During lent, it's typical that one must sacrafice something that they're addicted to during the forty day season. This year, I chose to give up chocolate. This is extremely hard for me because I love chocolate. I won't say I'm addicted to it, but I do love it a lot. Even though currently I'm on a strict diet, and I don't eat that much chocolate anyways, it's still very hard to go through the temptations. I was thinking about giving up something as well, but I'm still debating on it. It'll probably end up being Facebook, since I'm always on facebook. But then again, that would be really hard as well because I have the facebook application on my blackberry. The purpose of this is to sacrafice something just like Jesus did when he spent forty days in the desert with no food, and resisted many temptations. It is also a way to cleanse our soul and take away unnecessary things that we accompany everyday of our lives.

Perfect Guy

Is there such thing as a perfect guy out there for everyone? Is there such thing as a soulmate? Well according to my parents, their expectations for their 5 daughters are highly overrated and beyond possible. The "perfect guy" is a tall, Vietnamese, catholic, a doctor, handsome, and knows how to treat a woman. Is there even such thing as a guy out there that's like that? I doubt it. I don't understand why do my parents expect so much when it's not possible. We live in a country that's known for its diversity, and different cultures. Therefore, it's extremely hard to find a Vietnamese guy with all the characteristics. I just wish that my parents could understand that there's no such thing as a perfect guy out there, especially not in today's society. I also don't understand why do they have to choose who we have to date, instead of ourselves. In the longrun, it's us that will be with this guy, not them. So why do they care and why does it matter to them. It's so hard to live with the fact that my parents basically come from a different world, and still lives in the old days with all the traditions. I only wish they could just accept the fact that this country is not Vietnam, and the century has completely changed. Coming from a family with so many expectations is extremely difficult without a doubt =/

Counting down!

Spring break is coming near!! This will be my first college spring break, and I'm super excited. All my other spring breaks were never exciting, because I always ended up working on spring break. Even though I'll work for a little this spring break, I'm still planning to go somewhere, so that'll still be fun. I was planning to go to Miami for the week, but that ended up to be prosponed to the summer. This spring break, I'll be spending it up in Nova (northern va). I'm going to go to D.C, do some shopping, go to Six Flags, explore around D.C, and then head up to Ocean City in Maryland. I've never been there, so I'm sure it'll be an awesome trip. I don't want to get overly excited about this spring break, because half of the time when I do, something bad always happens. Just like how I was excited for Miami. I hope nothing happens, so I can enjoy my spring break. The break that I really need, just to get away from all the homeworks, essays and strenuous studying =)

Why?

Have you ever had a moment when something slipped out of your mouth, and you accidently said something you know you shouldn't have? Then you realize why in the world did you say that. Well it happens to me all the time. For some reason, during a particular time of the month (if you know what I mean), I tend to always say random stuff. I don't understand why, but I do, and I don't like it. I start saying random stuff, and then I completely regret saying it. Then in the end, it's too late to take it back, and I'd have to live with the guilt of saying whatever I said. This happens so much to me, that you'd think I learned from my mistake, but it's so hard to do so. It's just something that I have no control over. Sometimes I feel like someone has taken over my body and controlled it themself. Thus, it's so hard to control what I say during that time. It'd be nice to be able to do so, that way I wouldn't have so much guilt and regret, and deal with the situation of apologizing to the person. So I'm hoping nobody out there is the same way like this, because it's not so great of a feeling =/

My babies

Babies? I have babies? No...I don't have kids just yet, too young for that! =) My babies are my nephews. They are the loves of my life, and I honestly don't know what I'll do without them. They're currently 8 and 6, and they're the most precious thing in my life. Ever since they came into my life, I've changed completely. I've been happier than ever, and much more caring and responsible. Responsible because when my first nephew was born, my brother-in-law was diagnosed with cancer, and so I basically took care of him day and night the first 3 years of his life. Then my second nephew came, and at that time, my brother-in-law was still fighting cancer. While he was fighting cancer, my sister came up with kidney infection. So during that time, I took care of both my nephews. It was a hard time for all of us, but for me, I enjoyed spending quality time with my nephews. I loved watching them grow everyday, and watch their personalities differ each day. Not only did I take care of them since they were babies, but I also potty-trained them. Spending those 3 years with them made me grow closer with them. Now, they're too old to hang out with their aunt, and so I really do cherish those moments when I think about them. As of now, I have a niece coming on the way, and I'm extremely excited. This will be my first niece, so I know I'll be spoiling her a lot. I can't wait to spend time with her and grow a special bond between us two. It'll be a little harder this time because she'll be living in Texas, which is extremely far from me. So I'm hoping we'll still be able to connect and bond as niece and aunt =)

Friends vs. Family

After talking to a friend about my social life, I've come to realize that friends are placed in several different categories. You have your acquaintances (friends you say hi and talk to occasionally), those you hang out also occasionally, friends you hang out regularly, and friends that are your best friends that you are completely comfortable with. After talking with him, I've also realize that I don't have any of those except the first category, and that is acquaintances. They are the ones I see not too regularly, but also only say hi to on campus. Back home, I don't get to hang out much either, because I'm always busy with work, schoolwork, or taking care of my parents. I think the only reason why I don't have close friends nor hang out often as I should be, is because I spend so much time with my family more than with my friends. My family is very close, and we love to spend as much time as we could together. Especially when my sisters and brother comes home from school. My sisters are considered my best friends. Even though they're my family, but they are the ones I could be my crazy, dorky self around, say anything I want, talk to them about anything, and always know they're there for me. Friends come and go, but your family will always be your family no matter what the circumstances are. It hurts me to see my friends go through the pain and stress of loosing their close friends so often, which makes me not want to go through that. Hence, that's why I choose to rather be with my family than friends. So no matter if I don't have close friends like any other teenage do, but I have so something that not many people do, and that is a special bond between my family and I :)

Diabetes

Today, diabetes the most common disease that humans are diagnosed with. Victims of diabetes that are in my family are both my parents. My parents were just diagnosed with diabetes a couple years ago. Although it's minor, it still affects the health and strength of my parents. Both my parents have to take medications everyday, and it's painful to watch them have to do that. Because of the unstable condition of their blood sugar, they have to watch what they're eating constantly. Just a bite of a sugar product, my mom's blood sugar shoots up, and she begins to feel weak. If there's not enough sugar in her blood, then she begins to sweat and also feels weak. Not only does my father suffer from diabetes, but also high cholesterol. It scares me everyday, because you never know when he could have a heart attack from the high cholesterol. These diseases that occur everyday is slowly killing this world, and I start to get extremely afraid that one day, something will happen like that to my family. Therefore, it's no doubt that everyone needs to keep their body healthy, and heart. Always exercise and eat healthy, because one day, you can be a victim of these diseases.

My heroes

When people ask my who are my heroes, I immediately say that my heroes are my parents. My parents have been through so much for the life of my siblings and I. Back in Vietnam, my father was a P.O.W of the vietnam war. It was the captain of the navy and was captured while on mission. As a prisoner for 6 years, he has suffered through numerous of pains and obstacles. Being away from his family, starvation, hard labor, and torture beatings from soldiers. Still today, my father is haunted by the past and lives to tell his stories. One of the stories I specifically could remember is when he was he was in the concentration camps, he received 100 whips from the soldiers, only because he stood up for his friend. My father's courage and strong heart has helped him overcame the pain. While he was in prison, my mother was at home raising their 6 children alone. Without any money, food, nor help from any family member, my mother managed to survive, and better yet, raised my siblings and I to become wonderful children. It is because of my parent's strenght that got me and my family to America today, and being successful in everything that we do. Therefore, my parents are my heros ;)

Snowboarding

My friends invited me to go snowboarding this spring break in Michigan. And I must say that I'm not sure if I want to go. I attempted snowboarding about a couple years ago with my sisters at wintergreen resort. I was extremely excited to go at first because I've never tried it before, but I must say, snowboarding is a lot harder than it looks. You must have complete balance and control when you on the board, and I, myself, do not have either. I came on the board, strapped myself in tightly and was ready for flow with the wind Little did I know, I had completely no control of where I was going. Sliding down the mountains was extremely scary. You begin to feel helpless and you don't know when and how to stop with both your feet strapped on the board. Of course, sliding down the mountain did felt like I was flying, but I honestly don't like like the feeling of not be able to control where I'm going. Hence, I bumped into everything that was in my way. Whether it was people around me, or soft poles that kept align the the slopes. I eventually fell in all sorts of ways, and ended up bruising my back. I finally realize that snowboarding is not my sport, nor will it ever be. It was an adventurous experience, but I will not want to do it again ;)

Playing Piano

You know when you were a child, you've always wanted to play an instrument, only because you liked the way it sounded. Well, when I was a child, I've always loved to play the piano. Even though my parents couldn't afford to give me piano lessons, nor buy me a piano, I still had the passion. I remember how I would always pretend to play piano, even when there was no piano. Looking back at that now, I must've looked ridiculous playing air piano ;) Then 5th grade started, and they offered violin lessons for free at my school. Since it was for free, I decided to give it a shot. I loved the sound it gave, however, I wasn't very much interested in it as I was with piano. I did recitals competitions and all orchestra shows, but I didn't have enough passion about than O did with piano. So when I hit 13 years old, my parents surprised me with the biggest gift I've ever received from them. It was a grand piano. My dad saw how much I loved piano, so he saved up as much as he could to buy me my own piano, and provided weekly piano lessons for me. It was the best gift I've ever gotten from my parents. I took piano lessons for about 3 years, and I must say those 3 years were amazing. Every week, I'd get extremely excited to go to class only because my teacher was awesome. He has taught me a lot about piano, and especially how to listen to the sound through my heart instead of my ears. It's been almost 4 years now since I've taken lessons. It's much harder to keep up with the piano now that I don't have lessons, because the lessons forced me to practice much more before my tests and recitals. Now, I'll only play when I'm free or home from college. Thus, I've lost the touch of playing piano, and I'm not as good as I used to be. I still love it, so maybe one day when I have more free time, I'll take more lessons just to keep me up with it ;)

Soccer

Ever since I was a kid, I loved playing soccer. I could remember back in my childhood, my friends and I would always play soccer behind the house in the neighborhood. Even though I didn't play so well, I still enjoyed it. Then we moved out of that neighborhood, and then I stopped playing soccer till high school. It was a huge gap between that. The only reason why I stopped was because my parents could have never afforded to put me in a club to play. Then high school began, and I realized that the school's soccer team was in need of players. I tried out, and made the team. It felt like I was playing in the back of my house with my childhood friends all over again. Playing soccer brought a lot of happiness to me. It gave me a chance to step outside of my box and feel free. I've always been a stay-at-home girl, who studies or work all the time. But putting aside 3 hours of soccer practice everyday was amazing. When I reached my junior year, I became the soccer captain. Having that kind of leadership and power over the team felt really awesome. I was able to help those in need of improvement as well as build up my self-esteem to become stronger as a soccer player ;)

Why my major?

So in English class, we have a project on our profession, or our major. I'm majoring in Dental Hygiene, so it's difficult to be able to interview someone who is in that profession, especially when I don't know anyone in it. So I started to ask myself why am I majoring in this major? What's so great about it, that it's something I'm studying. Then I realize...my parents. My parents were the one who decided my major, and my career for my future. It's not so great that my parents are the ones that determine my future, but for now, I don't really mind. I don't mind only because I honestly don't have a passion or desire in something. When I grew up, I always wanted to be a lawyer. But thinking about that now, there's no way I can be that. I'm no where near being good at arguing to win a case, nor is my vocabulary so great. So that's not possible. So I guess being a dental hygienist isn't so bad. Although, it's only my backup. According to my parents, I'm suppose to continue in the dental field and become a dentist right after. I don't know about being in peoples' mouths all day, but it shouldn't be too bad after you get used to it? It's not so great of a job, but the pay is good ;)

Lotus Foot

So I learned something extremely interesting in Asian History last week. It really caught my attention, as well as the entire class. The lotus foot. Now, you may be thinking, what in the world is a lotus foot? The lotus foot was brought up in ancient times in China. Back in the days, women would bind their feet extremely tight in order to make them tiny. By wearing the bindings, their feet would slowly break and go in different directions to fit into the bindings. Their arch would completely break, which leaves the heel and toes. Because the bindings were drastically small (like a baby's shoe), the toes would curl under the foot. Looking at the top view of a lotus foot, all you'd see is foot with no toes and no arch. My professor said this was done back in the nineteenth century, because back then, during intercourse, the men would stick the women's feet in their mouths. If it was too big, it wouldn't be possible to do, therefore, the lotus foot was created. I was completely disgusted by this, as well as interested. The women wouldn't be able to walk anywhere nor do anything because of the pain, and the fact that theres no arch for balance. It's amazing to learn the things people do back then. Especially in different countries. If you have time, google lotus foot and take a look at the pictures. You'd be surprise of what you'll see ;)

Being happy

As I start to grow older, I start to realize that life is getting shorter by the minute. Of course, we all know that life can end anytime, and we must prepare ourselves for that. But I never put it into mind how serious it is, until recently. Throughout my life, I've been living with very low self-esteem and low confidentiality. I've never thought highly of myself, because I knew that I had nothing to show off for. The low self-esteem and low confidence in myself led me to always be depress and stressed. I was always sad, and I never understood why. Now, at the age of 19, I began to realize that I need to change. Change for the better. Going into my 20s, I want to be a totally different person. The person whom I've eager to be all my life. And that is a happy, positive attitude girl. I can honestly say that I am at that point today. With the help of exercising constantly, which releases my stress, and leaving the relationship I was in recently, I've become a much happier person. The relationship I was in brought a lot of drama and sadness in my life. Even though it was love, it was just not healthy for my mentality. Therefore, I had to end it because I just did not want to live like that anymore. So now, I'm just a happy girl. You'll always see me smiling, laughing, or just enjoying life. If something bad does happen, I'll try to twist it around and turn it into a positive situation. Life is short, and there's no time for depression or sadness in it. Enjoy it while it lasts, because you'll just never know when the day may come ;)

My job

I consider myself a very shy person when it comes to meeting new people. However, when I'm eager to meet a particular person, I would definitely approach that person, and try to get to know him/her. The place where I meet the most people and all kinds of people, would be at my job. I work as a nail technician, therefore, I come across numerous of people each day. Each client has their own personalities, and I find it very interesting. Some may be the nicest people ever, and some can be incredibly rude and disrespectful. It's amazing how there's such varieties of personalities in this world. Especially, from just a small business. Working as a nail technician has its advantages and disadvantages. For example, the advantages could be knowing someone who could help you in education-wise. One of my clients work as Dental Hygienist, and she offered me the position of shadowing her at her work. This helps me significantly, because I'm majoring in Dental Hygiene. The disadvantages would be coming across clients that seriously gives you a hard time. The opportunity to be able to talk to all kinds of people is pretty awesome I must say. I enjoy my job, even though it has its bad features ;)

No fair!

Have you ever been in a situation where you've worked so hard on something, and a friend puts absolutely no effort the work, yet manages to receive a higher grade on it. Well if you haven't, you're in luck. Because I've been through it so many times throughout my education career, that it's really getting to the point where I'm extremely frustrated and confused. Back in high school, I remember being in English class with the valedictorian of my class. She and I were very good friends, but the only thing that kept us from getting along half of the time was the fact that she would always get higher scores on schoolwork than me. Especially when it comes to essays. I would work on it day and night, dedicating myself to try to make the essay perfect, where she on the other hand, would "bs" the essay the night before, and even finish it up beginning of class, and end up with the higher score than me. It really annoys me. Not only on essays, but also on tests. So I'm thinking from now on, I should try and "bs" on essays, and maybe not even study for anything, and just maybe, maybe I'll end up with a higher score. Yeah right, that's not possible for me. Instead of passing with a high score, I'll be the one with failing grade ;)

Childhood

So recently, I met my friend whom I've known since I was a kid after many years of separation. He left awhile back, and we've stopped contacting each other for a really long time. Meeting him again brought back so much memories, like a huge flashback to the good old days when we were just little kids. We started talking about our childhood memories, and how we spent everyday enjoying life. We both grew up in a well-known neighborhood back in Virginia Beach called Twin Canal. Twin Canal was the place where all the Vietnamese families who just came to America would go to because it was own by the government, and the rent was affordable for us. So at twin canal, all the Vietnamese families knew each other, and all of the children would play with each other everyday. Everyday was a new adventure for us, and it was always something I'd look forward to after coming home from school. Back then, I had nothing to worry about. I didn't have to think too much, never stressed out, and no drama. Everything was carefree, and it was just the best. I remember always playing soccer, kickball, frisbees, jumpropes, hide and seek, and any activities you could name. We would stay out past dinner time, just looking up at the moon and telling stories. My childhood was amazing, and I wouldn't trade it for anything. I'd do anything to relive those moments, however, in reality, there's no such thing, and we must live for the future ;)

Why do people do crazy things?

I know this incident has happen awhile back ago, but it still haunts me and surprises me of the fact that how can people do such things. What happened at Virginia Tech several weeks ago is unbelievably crazy. For those that have not known about it, an international student at Vtech got decapitated by a guy she's only known for 2 weeks. The reason was never proposed, but if you think about it, what other reasons can there be? The girl has only known this guy for 2 weeks, it's not like it could've been a jealous situation. It's just really stupid that this guy who's known to be intelligent, respectful can do this Even worse, now the girl has to be brought home to her family in China, decapitated and buried innocently. It just breaks my heart. Not only is her family affected by this situation, but also the student body at Vtech. Still recovering from the traumatic massacre 2 years ago, another traumatic scene comes up again like this must be really hard to intake for these students. By reading the newspaper or just watching the news on tv, you'll see that there would always be a person killed or injured for stupid reasons. I ask myself everyday, "why do people do crazy things?" Do they not think before they act? It's amazing what goes through ones mind to be able to do such things like this. How could you be able to hold responsiblity and live with the fact that you took away innocent lives? ...:/

Too much pressure

Growing up in a family with children consisting of 5 girls and 1 boy is pretty difficult when it comes to education. Coming from a foreign country to the land of opportunities was a huge struggle for my family and I. We came here with not one word of English nor any knowledge of what life is like here at America. It was the toughest phase that my family had to go through together. Yet we overcame it and proved to everyone that working together as a family is well-worth the struggle. Besides the obstacle of settling down in an entire different world, education was a huge priority in my family. My siblings and I were taught that education is an essential now that we live in America, because education would have never been offered if we still lived in Vietnam. Therefore, throughout our life here at America, my siblings and I were pressured into doing well in school and one day have a career in the medical field. The pressure was set off when my oldest sibling, my brother, graduated from medical school 4 years ago with highest honor in his class. Knowing the fact that my brother came here when he was 18 years old, not knowing any English, yet still managed to become a doctor in 2 fields with highest honor, makes my sisters and I even more pressured. Now, we all have to follow my brother's footsteps and succeed 10 times more than he did because of our advantage of knowing English better than him. Currently, my oldest sister graduated as a respiratory nurse. The sister after her is in her 3rd year in medical school. The sister after her is in her 2nd year in medical school. And the sister after her is getting ready to start pharmacy school in the fall. That leaves me as the baby, to succeed as a dentist. So as of right now, I have a lot of pressure put on my shoulders to do well in school and accomplish more than my siblings do, because I grew up here longer than they did. It's not a good feeling, but it's a goal that I would definitely like to accomplish in life ;)

The best of both worlds

Ok so I am a Vietnamese-American girl, and I am very much proud to be one. I was born in Vietnam but came here when I was 2, so basically I've been here my whole life. I've been exposed to the American culture throughout my life, but also managed to keep the Vietnamese tradition culture at home as well. My parents don't know much English so they expect me and my 5 other siblings to keep our heritage and language for our own benefits as well as theirs. I'm grateful that my parents taught us to keep our heritage, because nowadays, those like me who came here when they were young, can't understand a single word in Vietnamese nor know anything about their culture. I remember back when I was young, my dad would always force me and my siblings to learn Vietnamese. Whether it was writing, reading, or talking it, we had to do all of them. What we would do was for every summer for every day, we had to spend about 3 hours each to learning Vietnamese Of course we had to learn the alphabet first. The Vietnamese alphabet is much more complicated than American alphabet. The Vietnamese alphabet contains 3 or 4 different ways to write a letter. For instance, there would be 4 different ways of the letter "a" because of the symbols that are attached to it, depending on how it's pronounced. That took forever to learn! After knowing the alphabet, we'd learned how to read. Then after knowing how to read, we'd learn how to write. Writing was the worst part for me, because how we did it was a person would read an entire poem or story, and you'd have to write every word for word that's from the poem or story. If you spelled a word wrong, you'd get either a slap in the face or you'd have to write the word 10 times each. It was very hard, but now that I realize it, I really do appreciate the effort that my parents put in to help teach me and my siblings the Vietnamese language. If it wasn't for that, I wouldn't be able to speak to my relatives and grandma back home, nor understand them when I visited back in 2005. Knowing more than 1 language really does have its benefits. It opens up a whole new world for you, and you could learn so much more from a different culture than just the All-American culture :)

Volunteering at CHKD

I'm getting ready to volunteer at the Children's Hospital of the Kings Daughters here in Norfolk soon, and I'm really excited to go. It's my second week there, and I really enjoy being in the kind of environment that's provided there. I've always wanted to volunteer there since high school, but I just never had the chance to do so. But now that I live right across from there, it's so much more convenient. I love children and I love being around them. They honestly do brighten up my day, and the fact that they each have their own personalities makes it so much more fun to be around them. So here I am, getting a chance to bring a normal life to children who has been bedsided since they were babies, just makes me feel better as a person. These children suffer through pain basically everyday, and the fact that they can't even get out on a beautiful day to ride their bikes or play in the playground makes me really sad. So what my job is as a volunteer is to bring that back into their lives by bringin them to the game rooms, read books, color pictures, or just having one to one time with them. It's amazing to see how much courage these children have, and how strong they are. I can't imagine what they go through each day. I, myself, can't even handle a cut, imagine these little bodies handling needles pricking them every hour. I admire their strength, and the only way for me to show that to them is to bring fun into their time that's spent there at the hospital. So for those that have a lot of free time on your hands, you should definitely sign up to volunteer at this hospital. It's great on your resume, and it'll definitely help you look at life in a different view. They really do need much more volunteers, so any help is much appreciated. Everybody there is amazingly friendly, so there's nothing that should hold you back from considering this opportunity. If you're interested, let me know, and I'll definitely give you more information on signing up! :)

The Gym

So I just got back from a 3 hour workout session at the gym. I go to the YMCA here down on Brambleton Ave, and I must say that this place is huge! It's 6 stories high, and it seriously has everything. From massage rooms, to a little praying area, to a room with DDR and other video games. It's quite awesome! I usually go to the YMCA back in Virginia Beach where I'm from, but now that I live here, I go to this YMCA. I never really liked going to the gym, until recently when I realized that I needed to regain my endurance and getting back in shape. I used to play soccer back in the days, and the first 2 years of high school. But then I stopped for awhile and haven't really focused on getting in shape. So now I go to the gym everyday for 3 hours, and I honestly have to say that it really feels good! I know a lot of people say that exercising really do release a lot of the stress and anxiety that builds up, and it really is true. Not only does it benefit mentally, but also physically. You gain much more strength and possibly lose weight. So for those who don't like going to the gym often, you should definitely check it out once in awhile. You'll definitly love the feeling :)

Who can be reliable?

When it comes to choosing a partner for your study group or lab, it's difficult to do so when you don't know anyone just yet in the beginning of the semester. So I decided to send out an email to the entire class asking if anyone needed a partner as well. I received a lot of replies back and ended up choosing only 3 out of those replies. We planned to meet up yesterday to start on our project, and one of them chooses not to show up. We planned on meeting up again today, and she still doesn't show up. It really frustrates me when you think you can depend on someone and they let you down. We sit there and waited for her for an hour and she doesn't even contact us. And so as always, we leave, and she calls to let us know she's on her way. Does that not frustrate you?? In any circumstances or excuses, you should always let your group know what's going on or when you're coming. Anyways, that completes my blog for today. Ask yourself the next time you choose a group or partner for your class projects: "Who can be reliable?" :)

Chinese New Year

So today, my country celebrates the Chinese New Year. Although I'm not Chinese, my country, Vietnam, still celebrates it. Historically, China invaded Vietnam and took over. Therefore, the Chinese culture is still part of Vietnam today. It's the year of the ox, and so hopefully for those of you who were born on the years of the ox will be lucky this year, as they say. What my culture usually do on Chinese New Year is first thing first, before we do anything else, we must wish our elders a lot of prosperity, strength, happiness, and blessings. After we do that, the elders reward us with what we call in Vietnam "li xi". Li xi is a little red envelope which contains money. It's something every child looks forward to every year, of course. After that, we'd celebrate with a lot of food and treats. Back in Virginia Beach, the entire Vietnamese community came together to the PCC center and had a huge celebration with music, dancing, food, most importantly, the lion dance! It was a lot of fun, and hopefully just reading, you all can get a gist of what my culture is all about ;)